I was married for three months when I literally found my husband cheating on me with my neighbors 24-year-old kid. I’m saying “kid” because this is our second marriage each and we were both in our late 30’s. It didn’t help that her mom had actually been a friend of mine for 11 years and their brothers had been best friends since they were 5.
How did I find them, you ask? Our Ring cameras. Swear to Bob those things catch everything. Even though he tried to sneak past them by pretending like he was checking the mail. Aaaaaaaah. Man it still makes my blood boil. He denied it until I pulled out the text on his Apple Watch (that he left our) where she ASKED him to come over and he replied to have that p*ssy ready. This little heifer said “ok”.
Ummmmmm. I’m not proud of the things that happened afterwards. I honestly could have lost my professional license and ruined my financial life (my personal life had already died earlier that day). It wasn’t quiet either lol. The entire street heard. Thank the Lord no one called the cops. I think they pieced it together and felt like I was justified in my public display of violence.
I kid you not, my neighbor, the girls mom, put her house up for sale the next day.
I obviously got a divorce, right?
I feel like the stupidest person in the world admitting this, but we didn’t.
I filed. He demanded counseling. He was treated for sex addiction by a trained therapist. I was treated for being stupid aka codependent. I hated him. But I still loved him. I didn’t trust him.
At first, I started focusing on myself to get back at him. Then I realized how much I like myself!
I stopped catering to him. No hot dinners unless I felt like cooking. No sex unless I was in the mood. I didn’t speak if I didn’t want to speak to him. I was angry for a good bit of the time for over a year. Counseling helped but I was grieving and I couldn’t rush through the stage.
When I finally stopped being mad, I realized all the work he was doing to save our marriage. He had honestly changed over the last couple of years. He was active in therapy. He stopped gambling. He kept his phone open with no passcodes. He cooked after work.
I slowly sank back into a comfort zone.
Yes I’m still embarrassed for staying, but it’s my life so fuck other people opinions really.
My biggest regret is that it was so awkward between my son and his best friend for a while but he totally had my back and said best friend would’ve speak to sister for months. I think had I divorced, it would have been easier on them. My son still doesn’t really speak to his stepdad to this day, and they used to be really great friends.
His cheating impacted a lot of people. Don’t cheat guys. It’s not worth it.